Is Paying for Sex Okay?

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May 13th, 2014

It’s considered the oldest profession, and headlines show that it hasn’t gone away. Lots of celebrities from Eddie Murphy to Hugh Grant have been caught with ladies of the evening (askmen.com). The Secret Service too was caught in a high profile media blitz last summer when they found that many agents were enjoying a Columbian high-class call girl service. Prostitution is legal in Columbia. Though American attitudes about sex are changing and in fact have changed, by and large most men in the U.S. are loath to discuss the issue. It’s still considered taboo. A study out of the University of Portland found that around 10% of males in North America have paid for sex. These men are 44.2% less likely to be hitched. If they are married, the results of this study show that they aren’t in a happy marriage. These guys are also kinkier than average and are more open-minded when it comes to bedroom antics. One of the reasons men seek out a lady of the evening is to fulfill certain fantasies they have. Some women prefer not to do certain things. But a call girl will do what is necessary to earn her salary, and to hopefully acquire repeat business. So is paying for sex okay? That depends on a lot of factors. First, where are you emotionally? Some guys take sex very seriously, others not so much. Any guy who has spent even a trivial amount of time at a strip club for instance knows that there is always one guy who thinks the stripper is in love with him. This happens with call girls, too. If you are the type to get emotionally attached then you are setting yourself up for a fall.

Make sure the girl is of a decent quality. Perhaps an escort service that comes recommended. Or spend some time on reputable websites and do some research. Guys have been robbed, blackmailed, and more by hookers. So it pays to invest some time and read reviews should she have some. It goes without saying that protection should always be used. The chances of catching an STD is far higher with a prostitute. In doing your due diligence make sure that she always uses protection. If she offers without, pay her so she doesn’t make a fuss but do not let her service you. You don’t want this one time to make you end up at the doctor’s office, or in the case of HIV/AIDS and herpes, alter your life forever. Keep it quiet. This kind of information, if it gets out, can hurt your career, your relationships with family, friends and perhaps with a significant other. If you are going to a call girl to have a fantasy fulfilled but you are with someone, approach your partner with it first. Don’t do it just because you are embarrassed to approach your romantic partner with one of your fantasies. In fact, it may be a bonding experience, bringing you closer together. But if you are single, have no moral objections and do your homework, it can be a scintillating experience, and a memory you can call up whenever the mood strikes you.

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Teen Pregnancies Plunge

By
May 6th, 2014

 @m_rhodan

U.S. rates fell more than 50% across all ethnicities from 1990 to 2010, according to a new report from the Guttmacher Institute.

Nationwide, teen pregnancy, birth and abortion rates have plunged, according to a new report from the Guttmacher Institute, a reproductive-health research and education organization. From 1990 to 2010, the U.S. pregnancy rate for 15-to-19-year-olds fell by 51%, with approximately 614,000 occurring in 2010.

A drop in pregnancies was seen across racial and ethnic groups, though Hispanic and black teens got pregnant at nearly three times the rate of their white peers. In 1990 the white-teen pregnancy rate was 86.6 per 1,000 vs. 223.8 per 1,000 for black teens. In 2010 the rates had fallen to 37.8 per 1,000 for whites and 99.5 per 1,000 for blacks. Among Hispanic teens, the pregnancy rate fell from a high of 169.7 per 1,000 in 1992 to 83.5 per 1,000 in 2010.

Similarly, there was a 66% decline in abortions from 1998 to 2010, when there were a reported 14.7 abortions per 1,000 women. Teen birthrates fell by 44% from 1991 to 2010, with about 34.4 births per 1,000 women.

“The decline in the teen pregnancy rate is great news,” lead author Kathryn Kost said in a statement. “Other reports had already demonstrated sustained declines in births among teens in the past few years; but now we know that this is due to the fact that fewer teens are becoming pregnant in the first place. It appears that efforts to ensure teens can access the information and contraceptive services they need to prevent unwanted pregnancies are paying off.”

In response to the decline, the vice president of education for Planned Parenthood Leslie Kantorsaid in a statement, “Planned Parenthood is thrilled to see a record low in teen pregnancy rates in this country.”

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How to Say what You Like in Bed

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May 6th, 2014

Your partner is great, funny, attractive, charming, easy to get along with, and you two have a lot of fun together (askmen.com). But whether they lack experience or you two just aren’t in sync, either way their performance between the sheets is not exactly up to par. This is a difficult matter to address. You don’t want to offend them, hurt their feelings or make them feel inadequate in the bedroom. Do not tell them what they’re doing isn’t right, unless you never want to sleep with them again. But on the other hand you shouldn’t have to endure an unsatisfying time in the bedroom either. The first step is to talk about sex. This is a lot of fun. It should be done with a purpose, but you don’t have to let on what it is. Simply discuss likes, dislikes, fantasies and so on.You don’t have to lay it all out on the table. Let it slowly unfold. But if you talk about what you like, they’ll take note and try it out on you later. By the way, you should do the same for them as well. If you satisfy and fulfill one of their desires, they will feel obliged and enthusiastic about fulfilling and satisfying yours. Another way to address it is to use “I” statements instead of the accusatory you. “I love when you touch me down there with your hand and you do that circular thing. Sometimes it makes me sensitive though and then it hurts when you stroke too hard. Can you be a little more gentle? But I really love how you do that first part.” This also takes a piece from modern management techniques, couching a suggestion in between two compliments.

Play sex games. Have your partner request an act for you to perform and then share your request with them. This is a fun way to get what you want without any negatives attached at all. Another tactic is to talk casually about sex when you two are just hanging out and talk about your technique with them. Do they like how you caress them? Would they prefer slow or quick motions? Do they like their bodies handled roughly or easily? Your lover will feel special that you care so much about pleasing them and it will make them want to ask you the same types of questions, giving you an in without having to broach the subject. If you have preferences, discuss it with them. Most couples enjoy talking about sex together. If your partner’s antennae go up, tell them how you want to experience everything together, since you love them so much. That’ll smooth things over. Make sure you approach the subject in a relaxed, enthusiastic manner. It should be a fun, laid-back approach. Do not use an accusatory tone. If you find that they are starting to get upset, ask why. Let them know that you are only trying to make your sex lives better and more enjoyable. Be open to their suggestions. Put your hand in your partner’s lap, around their shoulder or hold their hand. Make them feel secure, loved and appreciated.

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What you learn in your 20’s

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May 5th, 2014

Sure, most guys have a fumbling experience or two in high school and early college. But as you get older you learn more and more (askmen.com). And if you are thoughtful, each experience with someone teaches you something more. Many guys get the most experience when they are in their twenties. This is a time of self-discovery, liberation, meeting and dating lots of new people. It’s normally the time when we sow our wild oats before settling down to a career, marriage and perhaps children. Though we have more freedom of choice today, most guys still take this route. Though they may have to stave off marriage and kids a little longer, most guys seem to go down the same path. Still, those early days when you first got to chase singles sticks with you. Here’s what you learn in your 20’s. In high school we’re really just grateful that we got someone into the sack. It seemed like a heaven-sent miracle. But in your 20’s the mystery starts to wear off. One thing you begin to notice is that some people are bad in bed. They vary from those who just lay there, to those who get overly enthusiastic and call you a litany of curses, making you think they’re possessed. We begin to get a sense of who we really are, by our likes and dislikes in bed. We also get a handle on who can fulfill us and who cannot. Though you should still be thankful a date wants to take you to bed, it may not be you if things don’t go as well as you both hoped.

A lot of younger men and women think that the other should be a mind reader, know instinctually what the other wants. But in our twenties we start to get a handle on the fact that no one is a mind reader. We have to say what we want. Communication, likes and dislikes, the development of dirty talk, looking one another in the eye and even giving directions, of course in a sexy manner, start to develop somewhere in the second decade of one’s life. Lots of guys grow more sexually confident in their 20’s. In their teens they are often shy, blundering and have access to only a small number of partners. But in your 20’s, especially if you go to college, there are all sorts of people around. You have a lot more access, and bedroom slip-ups don’t get around a college campus the same way they do a high school, or in one particular town. It’s in your twenties that you start to explore more. Different positions, giving someone oral using different techniques, fore-play, and the post-coitus cuddle. We jump into so many different beds in our twenties, the most in our lifetime. But those formative years spell out who we are going to be in bed, what we like, what we look for in a mate, a lover, and a long term relationship. The core of our sexual beings is forged in our twenties. But if you are smart, it doesn’t stop there. Instead, you’re always working to shape up and improve your game.

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Getting Over a Dry Spell

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May 5th, 2014

Though many are embarrassed to admit it, lots of guys go through a dry spell from time-to-time. It’s normal. Sometimes it’s when he gets dumped by someone he really liked. He walks around in a cloud. He’s bitter about relationships. Or he just might need to get his mojo back. There’s trying to cope after a bitter divorce. Then there are those guys who are amazing but people seem to never notice. And the guy who was a catch but got sucked into a career and now has no time to meet anyone. You could have even moved to a new city and just haven’t run into anyone with potential. Whatever your situation, don’t fret. You can and will get over a dry spell and will be overwhelmed with a lover’s affections before you can say “Ah.” First, take notice of where you are right now mentally and physically (care2.com). From the physical standpoint, do you need to take part in a little exercise? Perhaps eat healthier and get more sleep. Try to change up your regime. The truth is, other people want to be with someone attractive as much as you do. Thankfully, men generally aren’t  evaluated as strictly. But still, everyone wants to be with someone who takes care of themselves.

Now what about mentally? If you are moping around depressed or anxiety ridden, you aren’t going to look attractive. People are drawn in by confidence, energy and passion. Do not change your personality, but if you are depressed explore why and get some help in managing it, and bringing it under control. What happened recently in your love life? Are you still getting over an ex? If it’s been a couple of months, realize that not every breakup is the same. Some take longer to get over than others. But it’s important to get out there and start fresh, rather than to wallow in self-pity. Make it a point to take stock. See what singles are out there. Who would be into you? Practice flirting. Express confidence. Be relaxed with who you are. Project your better qualities. Are you funny, witty, smart, inspiring or passionate? Let it shine through when interacting with anyone you are interested in. Show them your best side. Dress the part. People love a guy who looks good and smells good. Get yourself some good cologne. Be subtle with it. Don’t go overboard or you’ll turn them off. Elicit friends to set you up on blind dates. Try online dating. Lots of people are on there. You’re bound to find someone into you sooner or later. Find out where the cool places are if you’ve moved to a new city and strike up a conversation with someone who you will have something in common with. It’s all up to you. But don’t sit around waiting for it to happen, get out there and mix it up. It will happen for you.

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